One of the most popular concepts in modern marriage counseling is the idea that a husband should "date" his wife. Men are told, repeatedly, that the real problem in marriage is that they no longer treat their wives as they did before marriage. So, they are told, it is time to "date your wife." Plan for meals out or for special nights in the home. Send her flowers or bring her gifts. "Never stop courting her," he is told.
But, I have not heard of the same thing being told to wives. Wives are not told to "keep courting" their husbands or to set up special "dates" with him, except that they are supposed to enjoy him dating them. No one even really explains why this is a man's duty toward a wife, but it seems to harken back to that 1950's attitude that the man is already happy because he goes off to work every day while she stays home or to the idea that he is the only one with any creativity. This attitude is wrong because going to work every day is not a pleasure, it's his job, (2) a very high percentage of women go to work as well, and (3) women tend to be more creative anyway.
So, let's strike a blow for equality and date our husbands for a change. Why should you have to wait for him to take some action when you can take action. It's Friday, which remains the "end of the workweek" for a lot of people. Why not date him tonight? If you have no children, then go somewhere you know he would like to go. A restaurant he likes is always a good idea (he is always told to take you to something you like).
If you have children, then date him at home. Get a movie he would like to watch (not a "chick flick"), feed the youngsters early, and then have a quiet evening together with a movie, some popcorn, or some nice dessert.
Or, eat a normal supper and just have some special time together after the children are in bed.
Keys to dating your husband:
1. Do something he would like to do. Do it willingly and happily. Why? Because you love him.
2. Do not do this in order to "get him to talk." If you take him out to get him to talk, then you are serving yourself
and not him anyway. If he wants to talk, he will talk If not, he will just enjoy the company of his wife.
3. Be prepared for quiet, because he may not talk much, or a long conversation, or whatever.
4. Do not be negative while dating. You weren't negative when you dated him before, don't be now.
5. Be prepared for the fact that a nice evening spent with the women whom he loves is very different when,
instead of a good-bye kiss at the door, you go in the bedroom together.
You date your husband because you love him, not because you want a particular experience. You date him because he needs a night out sometimes. You date him because he needs to be the center of your attention sometimes. You date him because he spends week after week, month after month, earning a living, so he ought to "live" occasionally.
You date him for the same reason he is told to date you, because there was a time when he was special to you, when you looked forward to seeing him come to the door, when your time together was precious. It was a nice time, wasn't it?
Why should he have all the burden of somehow bringing back the sense of love you had in those days. You should date him.
You never know what might happen.
But, I have not heard of the same thing being told to wives. Wives are not told to "keep courting" their husbands or to set up special "dates" with him, except that they are supposed to enjoy him dating them. No one even really explains why this is a man's duty toward a wife, but it seems to harken back to that 1950's attitude that the man is already happy because he goes off to work every day while she stays home or to the idea that he is the only one with any creativity. This attitude is wrong because going to work every day is not a pleasure, it's his job, (2) a very high percentage of women go to work as well, and (3) women tend to be more creative anyway.
So, let's strike a blow for equality and date our husbands for a change. Why should you have to wait for him to take some action when you can take action. It's Friday, which remains the "end of the workweek" for a lot of people. Why not date him tonight? If you have no children, then go somewhere you know he would like to go. A restaurant he likes is always a good idea (he is always told to take you to something you like).
If you have children, then date him at home. Get a movie he would like to watch (not a "chick flick"), feed the youngsters early, and then have a quiet evening together with a movie, some popcorn, or some nice dessert.
Or, eat a normal supper and just have some special time together after the children are in bed.
Keys to dating your husband:
1. Do something he would like to do. Do it willingly and happily. Why? Because you love him.
2. Do not do this in order to "get him to talk." If you take him out to get him to talk, then you are serving yourself
and not him anyway. If he wants to talk, he will talk If not, he will just enjoy the company of his wife.
3. Be prepared for quiet, because he may not talk much, or a long conversation, or whatever.
4. Do not be negative while dating. You weren't negative when you dated him before, don't be now.
5. Be prepared for the fact that a nice evening spent with the women whom he loves is very different when,
instead of a good-bye kiss at the door, you go in the bedroom together.
You date your husband because you love him, not because you want a particular experience. You date him because he needs a night out sometimes. You date him because he needs to be the center of your attention sometimes. You date him because he spends week after week, month after month, earning a living, so he ought to "live" occasionally.
You date him for the same reason he is told to date you, because there was a time when he was special to you, when you looked forward to seeing him come to the door, when your time together was precious. It was a nice time, wasn't it?
Why should he have all the burden of somehow bringing back the sense of love you had in those days. You should date him.
You never know what might happen.
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