My how things have changed. Or, at least, they seem to have changed.
Summertime used to be a very simple season. Children awoke, ate cereal (or something) and went outside until lunch. Then, they ate lunch (a sandwich or something) and headed back outside. They played ball and chase and tag and built forts and played baseball.
Now, most of us live in an area where we do not want our children outside and, at the same time, our children often don't want to go outside. So, they hang around inside (air conditioning!) and, not surprisingly, are bored. And, somehow, their boredom has become our problem.
I am pretty certain that my parents spent very little time trying to entertain me or worrying about whether I was bored. But, somehow, we have reached a stage where our children's boredom is something we are supposed to resolve. So, we sign them up for camps and classes, we try to come up with "interesting meals," we take trips we cannot afford to places only our children will enjoy.
Summer has become a time for parenting overkill and, of course, for even less focus on our spouse. We have a bored teenager (or "pre-teen" or whatever we call them) and that seems like something we need to resolve, so we let go of our spouse and work on our child.
Do not let summertime become a time of decay in your relationship to your husband. Do not let your focus on your children be so powerful that you have nothing left for the man who married you. Bored children are, as we all know, simply children who refuse to be happy with what they have. They have computer games and board games and card games and (too often) cell phones. They have bicycles and swimming pools and television and books. They have lots they could do, but nothing they choose to do.
But your husband has you. His boredom matters much more to you than their boredom. Spend more time with him, and not just time nagging him to "do something with your son." Let him "do something with his wife" and let the son grow, as we all grew, by figuring out something to do for himself.
Summertime used to be a very simple season. Children awoke, ate cereal (or something) and went outside until lunch. Then, they ate lunch (a sandwich or something) and headed back outside. They played ball and chase and tag and built forts and played baseball.
Now, most of us live in an area where we do not want our children outside and, at the same time, our children often don't want to go outside. So, they hang around inside (air conditioning!) and, not surprisingly, are bored. And, somehow, their boredom has become our problem.
I am pretty certain that my parents spent very little time trying to entertain me or worrying about whether I was bored. But, somehow, we have reached a stage where our children's boredom is something we are supposed to resolve. So, we sign them up for camps and classes, we try to come up with "interesting meals," we take trips we cannot afford to places only our children will enjoy.
Summer has become a time for parenting overkill and, of course, for even less focus on our spouse. We have a bored teenager (or "pre-teen" or whatever we call them) and that seems like something we need to resolve, so we let go of our spouse and work on our child.
Do not let summertime become a time of decay in your relationship to your husband. Do not let your focus on your children be so powerful that you have nothing left for the man who married you. Bored children are, as we all know, simply children who refuse to be happy with what they have. They have computer games and board games and card games and (too often) cell phones. They have bicycles and swimming pools and television and books. They have lots they could do, but nothing they choose to do.
But your husband has you. His boredom matters much more to you than their boredom. Spend more time with him, and not just time nagging him to "do something with your son." Let him "do something with his wife" and let the son grow, as we all grew, by figuring out something to do for himself.
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