One of the really important points in this class is that there is no list of things to do. Why? Because the Bible does not give me a list to give to you. Any list is just the idea of the person who creates it and it is easily ignored and often wrong in your circumstances.

Your husband was not produced in an assembly line with all the other husbands. He may love Mexican food or hate it. He may love you in high heels or may prefer flats. He is an unique person with unique abilities, needs, and wants. 

This is where most preaching on "being a good wife" fails us. It is not, ultimately, about being a "good wife" at all, but about being an "excellent wife." As we have seen, an excellent wife is not someone following a list at all, but someone who loves her husband.

And it is not all about "submission." If you could pick one word that women would like taken out of the Bible, it would be "submission." Year after year, they are told to submit to their husbands. But being an excellent wife is a lot more than submission. Even submission is a lot more than we often think it is. 

What you have to learn is this:  being an excellent wife requires you to be an excellent person. We have already looked at the need to be trustworthy, to do good for your husband, to be diligent in your life. How many people do you know of whom these things are true? And they are not enough to be an excellent wife. 

Too many people think an "excellent wife" is a person who lives and dies by what happens in her home and doesn't really know or care about anything else. She doesn't "think too much." Women hear this attitude when we preach and they resent it, as they should. 

God calls women to greatness. To be an excellent wife does not begin with him, but with you. You become a better person. You grow in grace and knowledge. You grow in love and wisdom. You grow in grace in the eyes of others. You bring glory to him because of who you are. 

It is time to give up the theory of the "good wife" as a passive, uninformed, home-bound wife. It is time to embrace being an excellent wife, a woman of wisdom and honor and glory and beauty and love.

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