Okay, so you've been a good wife this week, trying to "do him good" every day. You have done something every day specifically in view of him being your husband. You have thanked or helped or offered or prepared or done something that you did not have to do, just because it was good for him. And he hasn't said a word to you about it.

What about thanks? 

There comes a time when we want people to thank us. We do something good for them and they just sit there and enjoy it. We made something they would like to eat and, well, they just eat it. They enjoy it, of course, but no thank you. We really wanted that thank you. 

Maybe you did something to clear up a room or arrange some stuff. Maybe you just did your normal job a little better. Maybe you dressed up and looked really nice when he got home. All great ideas, but no thank you from him at all. 

Getting no thank you has killed more good motivations than any other problem. Deep down, we want to be appreciated. Even though we know (in our minds) that this is what God wants us to do, we also, deep down, want our husband to acknowledge us and our effort. It is very hard to minister or serve day after day with no thank you.

I have two thoughts on this for today.

First, what can you do? If you asked for a thank you, you would get one (probably), but so what? It would have no real meaning. Anyone can be thankful when asked to be. Consider how the conversation would go and realize that you cannot ask for thanks that way. You can, perhaps, mention it in general at some time in the future, but it is really hard to think of how to do that in the moment and be satisfied with the result.

Second, what does it say about your motivations? If a person seeks thanks from the person being served, then that service is directed only at that person. If you "do him good" just to get something from him (a thank you), then this is just a manipulation and not service at all. Deep down, you are acting for a wrong reason. 

Ultimately, we "do him good" because it is our responsibility to do so. Because you are an excellent wife (or would like to be), you do the things an excellent wife does. You do them because it is your service to God, through which you serve your husband. If he thanks you, then that is wonderful. If he does not thank you, then God does, and that is more wonderful. 

The trick, in the end, is understanding that he deserves your kindness because he is your husband. Not because he is perfect (he isn't) or thankful (he may not be), but because you intend to be an excellent wife in order to honor and obey God. 

And that, my sisters, is the purpose of all our service.

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